IDK Why I Do This To Myself - Another Travel Story

There’s something so satisfying about taking a trip you never thought would actually happen.

My trip to St. Maarten is what compelled me to write the blog post about travel insurance. Long story short, the trip was rescheduled twice because hurricane season was exceptionally active this year, both in my hometown and near/directly over my destination….and nope. If you’ve ever been in a hurricane you know you never want to be in one again.

Needless to say, I did all this preparing in September (twice) and then when it was actually time to go I was quite underwhelmed. We hadn’t even booked lodging and rental car until a couple days before….

But my venuist spirit prevailed! And I started to get excited.

Y’all know I’m a lawyer right? Well….day of, I had several hearings scheduled, including an important one at 10am. My flight was at 1pm, on Spirit, from IAH. Before you freak out, there’s a couple factors you must consider:

1. Generally, these hearings like 5-10 mins and I’m called near the beginning of docket; in other words, I should have been done no later than 10:30 (the way the docket works, the court will tell you to be there at 10am but you won’t actually be heard at 10. The court has also told 10-15 other cases to appear at the same time. You have to sit and wait until your case is reached and that depends on your place on the docket (list).…you get the idea);

2. I had to appear because I have a client who insists on appearing for everything, even if the drive to the courthouse takes longer than the hearing itself;

3. I was planning to let the clerk know I needed to leave so she could move me to the top of the docket;

4. The airport is about 25 mins from the courthouse and I like to play the let’s see if I can beat Waze’s estimated arrival time game (don’t front, you’ve done it too);

5. I wasn’t checking a bag;

6. I reserved parking at my fav spot and normally if I tell the shuttle driver I’m in a time crunch, they’ll drop me off first;

7. I have pre-check;

8. I kinda love the thrill off not knowing whether or not I’ll make it to the airport on time; but I have a 98% on time arrival rate.

So to me, even if I left at 11 I would still have plenty of time. Well, here’s what really happened:

1. I over-packed trying to make sure I was gonna be cute (I wanted to have post-worthy outfits/swimsuits for memories and IG/Blog content, obviously). As a result, and b/c I know Spirit is not playing these baldheaded games with people and their oversized carry-ons (me), I went ahead and purchased the checked bag. That meant I needed to get there at least 45 mins before departure because thems the rules.

2. When I arrived to court, my case was the very last one on the docket…..literally dead last out of about 13. Per my plan, I went to ask the clerk if she could slide my case in earlier. However, this judge has rules about certain cases. Accordingly, my case would be called last per the list………………………..so I had to sit there and hope the cases before me were quick.

3. They were not. Each case took forever.

4. Confession, I started getting nervous about the time and canceled my parking reservation. I figured, at this rate, I’ll have to suck it up and pay to park at the airport garage.

5. By the time the judge called my case, it was 10:50am, well after my projected departure time.

6. Five minutes later, I was hustling out of there.

Actual footage of me walking out of the courthouse. Hip twist and all.

***sidenote: I was traveling with a group. My habitual last minute arrival to the airport stresses my friends out. But getting there too early means spending too much money and staring into space, neither is an efficient use of my time. It also leaves openings for conversation from strangers and no.

***footnote: Rewind to the day before our flight, I called my friend, chatted and causally mentioned my morning hearings. She freaked out. Then she snitched. Hours later, her and her husband called me to say they would fake labor to hold the plane in case I didn’t make it on time (get you some friends like mine even though I was about 62% confident I’d be on time). I reassured them (and myself)…I do this….it’ll be fine…

Once I got on the road, I realized I’d have enough time so I rescheduled my parking reservation. After 22 mins (ha….I beat Waze), I parked and got on the shuttle. It was 11:28. I mentioned to the driver that I was in a rush but he didn’t care. He picked up two more people and didn’t drop me off first.

Not to worry, I made it to the check-in counter with minutes to spare, slung my bag on that scale and skipped to security. Breezed straight on through and sashayed on over to the gate with my chest poked out, feeling real good about myself.

I scanned the crowd looking for my homies but they were nowhere to be found…..Guess what? I BEAT THEM THERE! Right….the same ones that were planning to lay out in front of the gate for me because they had no faith!

But wait….not only were they not there, here’s a list of things I had time to do before I saw them:

1. I had time to get food,

2. I had time to buy water and a snack for the plane (see what I mean about spending money?),

3. I went to the bathroom,

4. Fixed my hair,

5. Picked my nose,

6. Contemplated quantum physics and the time/space continuum,

7. Figured out the solution to world peace.

But then, as I was paying for my Cheezits, I look up and see them strolling through the terminal - AND they stopped for ChickfilA. Because this moment deserved a little drama, I threw my hands up in the air and proclaimed loudly, NEVER DOUBT ME AGAIN!

So that was that….I made it….the end.

Oh but on the way back…………………….we had one hour to connect to our second flight in Fort Lauderdale. As you may know, when you’re connecting between an international and domestic flight, you have to go through customs, get your luggage, and re-check in. That’s nearly impossible in one hour’s time. But, if you have Global Entry and Pre-check, you’ve got more of a chance. So, our flight arrived a few mins early and I announce to my friends, we need to hustle. The moral of that story is……I left them lol.

Fortunately, FLL is extremely efficient so my bag was waiting for me. I cleared customs in minutes and was off to the check-in counter. But, God! I got there with 5 mins until the cutoff time. I called and texted my friends to alert them…no answer. I finally saw them coming up the escalator and announced the check in time had passed. So while they handled that, I went thru security. The TSA agent wasn’t paying attention and tried to tell me to go through the general admission line. Nope. I took a sharp left and walked right up to the front of the pre-check line.

During my potty break, I heard them make the final boarding call for our flight, like 30 mins before departure time, and my friends were no where to be found. Welp, I boarded and gave them a call. My pregnant friend was on the other end huffing and puffing. My word…

The flight attendants started slamming the overheard compartments shut making all their announcements. I imagined my friends ran down the jet bridge and pushed their way onto the plane as the attendant was trying to close the door. Knowing them, that’s not what happened. They did finally appear at the front of the plane looking distressed and sweaty.

We all made it back home…all in one piece. Brought it back just like we took it, as my sweet daddy would say.

And that’s my travel story! Stay tuned for more info about St. Maarten.